The concept of certainty
This morning I listened to an interview of Conor Mcgregor by Tony Robbins and something that caught my attention was the idea of certainty. This confidence, the boundless energy of knowing what you’re creating and being certain about it. Being certain about why you are here, what you will do gives a path to life like no other feeling.
If you google things about certainty, this is what you’ll find;
“Certainty, argues neurologist and novelist Burton (Cellmates, 1999, etc.), is not a conscious choice, nor a thought process, but a sensation that can best be described as a “feeling of knowing.” As a feeling, like anger or fear, certainty does not rely on any underlying state of knowledge.”
It’s the second time this week that the idea of certainty has come to me. It came in a previous podcast I’d listened to about athletes and their mindsets as well.
All the decisions I’ve made in my life where I have felt completely certain are ones where I’ve never questioned myself. Where I’ve never thought, wow I wonder what life could have been like if I didn’t make that decision. Big decisions too, like breaking up with my ex, or taking a new role in a company, or moving countries.. I’ve been absolutely certain and that’s when I’ve never looked back. It’s like this feeling of confidence, this surety that doesn’t always come through at all times of making a decision but when it does, you just know. I guess it’s like literally drawing your line in the sand.
I’ll never forget a lesson a friend and colleague once taught me about waiting to respond or waiting to make a call on something. It didn’t have to be so soon or quick, I was allowed to hold back, think and make a call with a clear mind. She was right, I rushed into everything and that often meant I wasn’t sure.
More recently, I’ve been reflecting on the present and how I got here. I’m in a job that has been the most challenging of my career yet. Not just because it’s a new industry and a huge learning curve but because I’ve had to really reflect and look internally for things I was used to fulfilling with external recognition or acknowledgement. It’s been emotionally challenging and adapting has been so much harder than I could have imagined. I’ve had to really reach into all four corners of my mind to truly face myself. Through this journey of self discovery I’ve also been so resistant to myself because I have been uncertain of what I value and how to acknowledge myself.
My resistance is because of fear. It’s classic really, the fear of the unknown. Even though the reality is NOTHING is truly known. We could all die tomorrow and here I am sitting in my uncertain not making moves to live my life. Instead, I’m sitting in fear of the uncertain but sitting still, I think I will choose to move. I think I will choose to feel fear but try things. Not work a 9-5 maybe. I want to see the world. I want to learn things about myself I didn’t know. I guess this too has been part of that.
Now, is the only time. And, now is the time to do things that scare me.
I can work a classic 9-5 for the rest of my life, I can climb the corporate ladder until the ripe old age of 80 if I really want. So why do I insist on sitting still in the uncertain?
I made a list of all the things I am certain about, none of them seem to relate to a specific type of work or job role. Here goes, in no particular order:
- I love the ocean, to travel, to eat great food.
- I love to learn about cultures, history, the mind, myself
- I like to feel smart and be seen as other people as a smart person
- I love to feel physically and mentally strong
- I love money and I want a lot of it, and I want to do amazing things with it
- I love and care about people and making deep and meaningful connections
- I want a partner and children, one day
- I am a leader
- I love singing and dancing, it makes me feel amazing
- I’m good at and enjoy public speaking
- I love the coming together of people for the same purpose, a deep collaboration, a oneness.
These are the things I’m certain about, for everything else, I’m not sure and I think that’s okay.
From an uncertain meanderer